unveil

Whatever it is, I love you Mummy.

2010-01-24T02:52:00.001+08:00

It’s like you pull down your defenses and all that pride ego shit just to get the message across and someone shoots you in the face and puts you to shame. If you just wanna win, say so. Then maybe I won’t let myself get so affected.

Sometimes I feel you should come clean with yourself, then I too can get some sort of release in return. It’s hard to know it exists and that you’re always denying it.

I know how much I’ve let you down this entire time. I’ve been wasting my life. I should be somewhere but I’m not even near it at all. I admit it and I’m deeply sorry. That is why I’ve been trying to pick myself up and telling myself it’s time I woke up and worked hard for myself. Somehow, Brisbane seems like where I’m gonna start my new life. And I want to do my best.

The sickening part of quarrelling with you right now is knowing that although we’ve so much unhappiness, family would still be the people I miss most when I’m actually there. I don’t like this feeling and that is also why I’m reflecting it to you, hoping we could change to have a more healthy and positive relationship before I go.

I want you to know I can be trusted. I’m willing to study hard and that your hard-earned money is not going to waste. Give me a chance to grow, Mummy. And I will show you that I’ve matured. I thank God that He placed you in my life to be my mother, because no one else could have brought me up better than you did. And are still doing.

Whatever it is, I love you Mummy.

The last wish is

2009-04-19T03:03:00.002+08:00

it’s a happy day! i realise how rare i even say this please? that’s because i’ve been dying to see Tightness’s little son Zachery and i finally did just that today. whee to go man, he’s such an adorable little dude and very duper hyper too! we couldn’t possibly keep up with him, he was always on the run and treating everywhere like it was his playground. i haven’t seen him since the small boy was a tiny baby? hey Kexin mummy, we should do this again some time man! but before the next, we’d better have more energy with us than today. ;)

the last wish is i won’t be disappointed when this journey comes to an end (if it ever does), knowing i’ve given it my all in letting you understand how much you mean to me. thanks for the subtle reminder T, i’ll constantly remember to do away with any expectations. :)

It’s the postcard project at hand, it must be.

2009-04-17T21:17:00.003+08:00

i’ve been falling in and out of sleep regularly, and i think it’s more than just insomnia now. especially within the past fortnight, i wake up everyday from these odd but interesting dreams. you know what’s the crazy thing? they’re all about my PL secondary school days. i get glimpses of myself sitting in a classroom with my fellow upper sec classmates, and we do the usual been-there-done-that stuff. like attending lessons, kidding around with one another and disrupting classes?

then i’ll open my eyes, feeling a little empty and begin asking myself why i dream of such every single night. it took me a while, but i might have figured it. i almost forgot to mention that you’re the only one who never fails to appear in all these dreams, although most of the time you’re ignoring me. isn’t it already happening in reality context? it’s the project at hand, it must be. plus the fact, i miss those PL days and i wanna head back there quite badly. so just tell me about it.

let’s move on to i wanna do a shoutout to Blessann Luah Xiao Wei! because she’ll highly likely see this, i’m hopeful. the first thing is i miss you so much, you’ve no idea at all? i appreciate how you still want updates from me, even though you didn’t get much from my previous entry. you know what, you should just take a trip back home and i’ll tell you everything! and hey, you too need to update me okay? enjoy your upcoming bagpacking holiday, take care of yourself, be good and i still miss you more lah. :)

I’m never gonna stop singing, because you’re the sing-a-long song.

2009-04-14T19:11:00.002+08:00

i reckon me and updating my blog has become more like a seasonal affair. the reason this time around? because this sacred avenue was used as a weapon against me, and what makes it worst is i really dislike people saying untruthful things about me in the back. moreover if you’ve always regarded that someone as a friend? anyway i’m back here again, believing this chapter is closed and allowing it to fade away. thinking back, it still gives me a cringe! period.

too many overdue updates, i don’t even know where to begin. of course there are some things that haven’t changed, like the fact that i’m still jobless, considering study options and very unsure about my future. i super need an intervention of sorts, to start my engine going again. omg i’ve been bumming around for more than a year now, and no it’s not funny at all. i’d better work on it man!

on a happier note, i’ve forged a handful of new and closer friendships within my away time. you know who you girls are! i’ll treasure. :)

i survived your cold shoulder quite a while back, but something tells me i might be heading for the same thing soon. you know what, you do what you want and i’m still gonna do my thing. you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and doing these little nothings is just my way of telling you this. it doesn’t really matter what’s at the end of the road, i wanna walk the journey being true to myself.

i’m never gonna stop singing,
because you’re the sing-a-long song.

everywhere I go reminds me of you, love.

2008-12-23T03:47:00.002+08:00

updates to go, so let’s jump right into it!

today’s bbq with the sunbeams at changi green kick starts my string of christmas gatherings and such. i must admit hanging around the younger ones really makes me feel oddly old, all those teenage things they strut, which are more of been-there-done-that to me. but we had a couple of good laughs over food and games, i’ll see these kiddos in church soon. :)

my year end lineup is gonna be a busy one, because there shouldn’t be a moment wasted as 2008 takes its closure. maybe it’s time to sit down, reflect on this past year and make new resolutions? whichever way, i need some form of intervention to fall upon me.

3-day christmas forecast: tomorrow’s a dinner party at ms koh’s humble abode, followed by christmas eve at downtown east in the day and censor meet-up before midnight & finally, family dinner at aunt’s place on christmas day :D

everywhere i go reminds me of you,
but you’re nowhere to be found.

I just wanna tell you baby, how much I am feelin' you.

2008-12-19T00:47:00.003+08:00

i see something in you
something nobody sees
i see yellow and blue
yeah, the sunshine and the sea
when i think of love i think of you
yeah it's my favourite thing to do
you're my missing puzzle piece
yeah you are, perfect for me

you've got your own rules
i don't mind playing your way
baby, take me to school
and i'll pay attention
to every word you say

you walk into a room
all eyes are on you
everyone wants to know your name
baby, you make 'em swoon
yeah baby, you're so smooth
you take every breath i breathe away
i just wanna tell you baby
how much i am feelin' you

every time you go away,
you take a piece of me with you
every time i miss you much,
i wanna bake some brownies

yellow post-it note;

2008-11-05T05:31:00.002+08:00

i’m taken aback, and it’s rather indescribable in a blissful way. how did a continuation of my episode roll up in your dream? actually i wonder if you had a glance of that yellow post-it note, whether it’s reality or just in a vision. i don’t quite know but i’d love to believe it’s serendipity between us two. maybe someday, i’ll earn the beef. :)

moving off, it’s on to today’s doings.

i left my comfortable crib early this morning, unlike the usual afternoon me, for an interview with nike all the way at the expo area. it went well on the whole and i’m positive i performed alright. out of the ordinary, i was made to do a sports quiz testing for my knowledge on the international sports scene. i think i scored average, but the idea of taking a test at an interview is definitely one of its kind. anyway, i do hope to hear from them soon!

fancy playing basketball under the night sky with many stars? i did just that for brother bonding time, and we had too cool a midnight play. more of such random games to come i suppose, whee and our mad caps. :D

21 stalks of yellow roses;

2008-11-01T03:28:00.002+08:00

the colour lovers reveal that a yellow platter is the perfect way to tell your friend you want more, and to express a friendship peppered with longings of love. it’s warm, sunny and happy, often signaling a change. the number of stems speak forth my dedication and utmost wishes to you.

i’m more than words, so it’s a baby step to convey my innermost message. but don’t get me wrong, i only do such if i feel you might be the one. :)

and yes, although it’s not my kind of party, happy halloween to my freaky friends and their scary looking outfits!

you’re a queen, you’re my Godsend.

2008-10-15T04:09:00.002+08:00

i find myself staring at pictures of you, and i can’t get my eyes off those beautiful eyes that have a story to tell. actually, i’m all ears if only you’re willing to share them with me. frankly speaking, i know when he’s been on your mind because that distant look is in your eyes.

i really wished i knew what to say, just to make you feel a little better in any way. but it’s a personal choice you have to make, and no one should waver how you get about it. maybe it’s the angels who brought me here?

you’re a queen,
you’re my Godsend.

I passed my basic theory test.

2008-10-12T04:24:00.002+08:00

i passed my basic theory test this morning, but i’m in no mood to be over the moon. in fact, my heart almost skipped a beat when the instructor showed me my designated station number. maybe it’s serendipity at play, because i was reminded why i took up driving in the first place. it’s a promise i made to myself, although some people might find it silly. anyway, the good thing is i’ve cleared it and i’m one step closer to the wheel. :)

yeah i’ll say it, i’m rather bothered. at first it was the fear and uncertainty, followed by a piece of paper i stupidly misplaced and most recent, over a status i was totally clueless about. i don’t wanna play games, but i’m starting to think this game wants to play me. why can’t things be simple? with these thoughts running wild, it’s easy to see why my room can no longer contain me. and so, i went on an aimless night walk with some emo music in my ears.

i miss you, and that’s all i could gather from my long stroll. but you’re too far away and you don’t know how i feel about you all this while.

it's the way she's always smiling,
that makes me think she never cries.

it's my favourite gin and tonic.

2008-10-01T03:47:00.002+08:00

why do i keep running from the truth?
all i ever think about is you
you got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
and i've just got to know

do you ever think when you're all alone
all that we could be
where this thing could go
am i crazy or falling in love?
is it real or just another crush?

do you catch a breath when i look at you?
are you holding back like the way i do?
'cause i'm trying and trying to walk away
but i know this crush ain't going away

it's not neat,
it's not on the rocks,
it's my favourite gin and tonic.

because the possibility that
you would ever feel the same way about me
it's just too much, just too much

yes, it's a change of heart.

2008-08-19T03:10:00.002+08:00

it’s been quite some time since i bumped around here, but i shall leave updates for another day. :)

i find myself rather caught up, with things that matter to me but they might not mean anything at the end of everything. with truth and conviction, this isn’t just a phase i’m going through, it’s now for real and i’m falling faster than i can imagine.

there are so many what ifs that fill my mind, it’s as though we were written in the stars. i don’t think words could ever describe this sort of feeling, because it’s something so close to the heart and it’s hard to deny.

i guess things are still in complication, so i'll take a look around and do the bare minimum. frankly speaking, i just want to be there for you and make sure you get out of your rough patch with the least pain. the road treading towards you is going to be a long and difficult one, but i’m going to fight it because i know you’re worth it all.

every breath is your love,
every heartbeat speaks your name.

my first night cycling trail

2008-06-18T04:05:00.002+08:00

updates to go, so let’s hit it.

i’m done with babysitting those three adorable dogs, because its owners have returned from their holiday week. this also means i won’t be seeing them regularly, and i’m gonna miss them little things. believe me on this one, taking care of doggies is quite therapeutic and it never fails to put a smile on your face. try it, if y’all ever get a chance!

with the borrowed bicycles we could get our hands on, the Jtwins went on a night cycling trail yesterday. we covered the Toa Payoh and Bishan areas, did dinner and checked out Bishan Park too. it was my first night cycling experience by the way, and i’m quite positive i’ll do it again. very breezy and cooling, just what you’ll need to curb the humid weather.

good news for me, i finally got a digicam from the Suntec PC Show! it’s a silver Casio 8.1 MP one, quite sleek and light weight i must say. i should begin some sort of photo blogging soon, it’s tiring to type chunks of words at one go. hail the new camera and the photos that will be taken with it. oh, i can’t wait to start snapping away!

lately, some things are very fucked up. you heard it and i’ve used the freaking f word. please don’t make things ugly now, it’s exactly what i should be telling you. maybe you should ask yourself if you’re in for logic or drama, because none of this is going right. i don’t see a point in meeting only for farewells, where’s the realness in doing it?

of course we’ll always be friends, but i don’t think sticking with your choice is going to help us at the end of the day. and you’re making it so tough for me to finish up the scrapbook, what an absurd request to ask of me. quit playing up and just think about it all, please.

A change of heart or just a phase?

2008-06-14T00:48:00.002+08:00

it’s been quite some time, as usual. the graduation show is way over, but i’m still bumming around. i’ve been flipping the recruitment section of the weekend papers and trying to find some suitable job offerings. not that there aren’t good ones, but i’m just delaying the beginning of work life.

everyone seems to be on a holiday spree, having the time of their lives in places like Japan, Bangkok and Bali, just to name a few. i can’t wait for my first paycheck when i decide to start work, then i’ll be able to do the same.

and yes, the PC Show at Suntec City (12-15 June) is on and i got myself two portable hard disks yesterday. Jtwin accompanied me, and we met up with Ms Paua for a dosage of root beer floats too! ha, i have the both of them to thank in helping me make some tough decisions.

i’ll be heading there again tomorrow, my mum wants to get her hands on a new digital camera for the family. yeah, and little sis will come along to choose a decent colour. definitely more memories to keep when the time comes, more flashes to go!

meanwhile, i’m a babysitter to three dogs for a week. owners are out, so i’m in charge! feed them, clean up their poo and pee, throw them random treats and play along. they are a very amusing bunch; Clor, Jtwin and JB have already popped their heads in for a dog visit. and i’m sure they enjoyed themselves. (both the humans and the dogs, ha!)

moving on, i’m caught in a dilemma right now. a change of heart or is it just going to be a phase?

how's life like, after nearly five months.

2008-03-05T02:20:00.000+08:00

y'all haven't heard from me for the past four months, and i'm more than aware of this long break from texting about the ongoings in life. maybe and most likely, no one blog stalks to my realm. anyway, there was just an urge to update out of the blue. :)

many significant things have occurred during the intended MIA period, with some resolved and others left to hang. but one thing's for sure; school's out and permanent holidays are in, my internship was long over and i'm done with the final year of diploma pursuit.

i guess it's time to take a good break, look through the available options and move on to the next juncture. and so, the five's (b, 2j, t, m) and my beloved clique are exploring the potential of fun packed vacations. yeah, and these are just what we need before everyone heads off to job interviews and degree programmes! more research and discussions please.

not moving on and it's been a year, such a wasted and foolish bother.

enough said for now, i'm heading to my comforting crib, it's time to get sedated. finally, after a demanding semestral week of sleepless nights. running along.

JB Notion: swapped our roles

2007-10-31T20:39:00.000+08:00

it’s been a long while,
but here’s the new JB Notion:
rubbing off onto each other,
officially swapped our roles

unlike in the previous occasions, this time this notion applies to us. my stand is firm, we all need communication to sustain any form of relationship, not to mention our friendship. sharing thoughts, feelings, values and everyday ongoings are the bricks to building a long-lasting friendship. don’t feel obligated to fill me in, but do the above in your own comfortable pace.

unlike other friendships out there, i hereby testify that we, the JB Notion, have forged a meaningful bond and both of us know how much this is worth. such a close bond also caused our traits to be rubbed onto one another, and we’ve officially swapped roles in times of friendship crisis.

friendships are about accepting one another in every aspect, i’m sorry for molding you into what you’re not. being unreal in front of me it shouldn’t be, you should be true yourself and be free to express every emotion. i don’t know how to, but i really want to return “you” back to you. and if you’re willing, i’ll be first in line to help you find “you”.

you mean the world to me and i don’t want to lose this friendship. so please don’t walk out on yourself, on me and our precious friendship. i’m praying you give me a chance to share the weight on your shoulders. things may now seem all discouraging and clueless, we have to keep the faith and come up with solutions a step at a time.

just like what you’ll say in the past, i believe these obstacles will bring us closer and make our friendship a stronger one. another point to add to your famous line; let’s take these as learning points to help us grow, for better mutual understanding.

one more time, i would like to say “happily ever afters” can happen in friendships too. are you with me?

till the next time we meet-up, i miss you.

The Way You Look Tonight

2007-10-22T01:16:00.000+08:00

you're lovely, with your smile so warm
and your cheeks so soft,
there is nothing for me but to love you,
and the way you look tonight

and that laugh that wrinkles your nose,
it touches my foolish heart

a black-white film on replay ;

2007-09-18T17:51:00.000+08:00

in a story that lingers in my mind
just like a black-white film on replay
in the deafening silence of the night
just a whisper away, gentle kisses
in the holiday line of shops and people
just gallivanting, holding hands
in the worn-out leadership camps
just trailing footsteps, arms on shoulders
in the comfort midnight phone calls
just all ears, a beautiful voice
in the significant period of time
just a missed opportunity, a foolish loser
in the course of confusion and complacency
just allowed it all to slip away

what i should’ve said
just wouldn’t pass my lips
so i held back and now we’ve come to this
i should have found a way
to tell you how i felt
now the only one i’m telling is myself
cause it’s all too late

what do i do now that you’re fading away
no back up plan, no second chance
and no one else to blame
all i can hear in the silence that remains
are the words i couldn’t say

a promise, a couple of years ago.

2007-09-11T15:30:00.000+08:00

despite all these on-goings, i’m still more than willing to lend you a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on, if you were to need any of such again. this was, this is and this will always be a promise i made unto you a couple of years ago. you’re one strong girl and believe me, you’ll get through this ordeal, no matter what the outcome may be. hang on tight!

a lousy week ;

2007-09-11T15:05:00.000+08:00

it’s been a lousy week, with an unending ride of emotions. and almost 4 years since i last felt so awful about myself. even if you probe me now, i can’t quite figure out how and where to begin the past week’s encounters. there seems to be an indescribable struggle to voice these thoughts into words, and every time i try to do so, i end up in uncontainable tears. this has been going on for a few days, the aftermath is i’m all drained and eyes are sore from all that crying in my crib.

i’ll start with the basics, i walked out on 2 particular friends. i don’t know what got into me, but it’s altering the way i used to view friendships. i’ve thought my friendships through, it’s not an egoistic issue, but i still can’t identify what i did wrong. i was just being true to myself, behaving in my Jessica means.

my respective impressions for both friends :
(1) you’ve known me for a long time,
but you still don’t understand me.
(2) you seem to understand me,
but you don’t know me at all.

i’ve never taken your friendships for granted, it’s just that sometimes we don’t see things eye to eye. maybe next time y’all would want to think through it, before making such comments and wounding the feelings of others. or perhaps, there won’t ever be a next time.

my mum’s right, for once. i should concentrate on my own life and not meddle in the affairs of others. i’ll carry on with my fast-paced IPP work life, dumping both hands into data spreadsheets and events management. i’m beginning to gain a liking for such a systematic lifestyle, it effectively blocks out those unnecessary thoughts, for a while. i don’t know but it’s easier to be happy at work, maybe because no one really knows me and it’s effortless to put up a front.

you don’t know what it’s like,
welcome to my life

Kiss, Kissing, Kissed.

2007-08-25T23:14:00.000+08:00

Hebe & Ella ;
i don't know about y'all, but these snapshots made me stare at the PC screen for longer than usual. period.

SIZZLE

SEXY

only left with a fusion of mutual missed calls ;

2007-08-18T04:05:00.000+08:00

tossing and turning in my comforter, i find myself very much awake. do a time check, it reads insomnia. running all over in my mind ;

it’s been quite a while.

i saw you from a distance, through many rows of tables, an all-new notion dawns upon me. it’s effortless on my part to pick you out from a crowd of people. and it was only at that moment, when i understood how much i’d been losing out on you. tell me about my ego setback, because i’ll just leave it behind and simply say, “i really miss you”. how infinite, i don’t know other means of expression.

only left with a fusion of irregular mutual missed calls, is this what lingers on from those fond days?

Is it too late to regret?

2007-08-13T23:04:00.000+08:00

another JB notion in play, what am i gonna do with her? it’s an awfully good question, but i don’t have the answer, even to this question that matters much to me. if you wanna know whether i still feel the same, i’ll look you in the eye and express that you still mean a lot to me and those feelings remain as firm as before.

the useless idiot; i used to rehearse in my heart the things i’d been wanting to say, but when the time comes and you’re right next to me, all that practice evaporates into nothing and i ended up keeping it all within. i’m clueless about your thoughts, i’m not good with words, i don’t know and i don’t want to play my cards right.

i miss you, i miss those days when we got to hang out very often. a new semester brought about fewer meet-ups, fewer phone calls, fewer chances and fewer moments. i’m beginning to dread this deafening silence between us, does this mark a whole new chapter of where everything crumbles down? is it too late to regret, because i’m willing to pick up these pieces and begin from somewhere again.

2007-08-13T22:39:00.000+08:00

pardon me, i know i’ve been missing in action for a long while. i haven’t found time to hang around online, be it msn or blogging? all that truckload of assignments and projects within the past few weeks, with real tight deadlines following one after another. how suffocating and i was very much caught up with such. but what’s decent to know is these hectic days are over and yes, my final entrepreneurship’s presentation on saturday went off quite okay. let’s not drive at the details, because it was just a case of some brainless head with blind associates. i shall not be in the position to mention any more.

yeah, it’s study week at the moment, which also means the dreadful semestrals are approaching. they officially kick start on the 17th and would end by 23rd Aug. so tell me about it, the same old story when it’s exam time, having to find the motivation, get my butt down and begin a series of revision for the 4 modules. and of course, straight after those exam papers, i’ll have to hail the arrival of 11 weeks of IPP. the entire outline of my schedule for the next few months, i’ll update y’all when the time comes.

moving on, i’ve mastered the art of solving a Rubik’s cube a couple of weeks back. with everyday practice, i’m now able to solve a scrambled 3x3x3 cube in slightly less than 4 minutes. it’s one mind activity that really got me fascinated and i’ve been hooked ever since. yes, the JBs have been doing regular hangouts just like before and ashamed to mention, i’m still working on Blessann’s birthday present. very much overdue, i’ll nod to that. my apologies, i will get it done eventually, no matter what. more Botak Jones behind my house, please?

blessann's optimistic notion

2007-07-12T21:55:00.000+08:00

i don’t know and i don’t wanna deny it, but maybe JB’s notion could actually be possible. my best friend is optimistic and confident, i’m not. you believe i should cease all that thinking-too-much and bring my intentions into actions.

yes, i’ve all along been considering many factors and contemplating the several outcomes of such. but i can’t help it, because i really have no idea what’s going through her mind. can i trust my intuition? how much of it truly depicts the other side of this story? i can almost hear you say that i’ll never find out if i don’t begin somewhere, and soon. time’s running out on me, i may already be gradually losing all that i’ve been building up, so tell me about it.

my heart says we've got something real, can i trust the way i feel? cause’ my heart’s been fooled before. am i just seeing what i want to see? or is it true, could you really be? i’m at the point of no return, so afraid of getting burnt, but i wanna take a chance. so please, give me a reason to believe.

what should i do to bring it back,
those perfect moments and more?

Are You a Risk Taker?

2007-07-04T15:11:00.000+08:00

You take the most risks when it comes to Following Your Heart

Are You a Risk Taker?

Brought to you by Tickle

building it up, just to watch it fall.

2007-07-02T02:05:00.000+08:00

my intuition tells me i’m gonna lose everything that i cautiously attempted to build up, be it those magic moments or an imperfect connection. i'm so scared that you’ll see all the weakness inside of me, because maybe deep down inside, i’m just a loser. it always seems effortless to advice others to go all out, follow their heart’s desire and pursue the love of their dreams. but when you revert such advice to yourself, you’ll find things are easier said than done. no matter what, i’ll try to regain the courage i once owned.

it’s time to prove my love once more,
it’s time to find a way back into love.

an escapade

2007-06-15T19:56:00.000+08:00

let’s go on an escapade, i need to release all that is within me. there is too much bothering me, i wanna run off far away and just scream. i’ll try to address some of these issues here ;

1. tell me what’s the problem with some lecturers, they just love to throw their weight around. you approach me in this new semester, requesting for a report that i rebelliously didn’t hand in during the TEP period. what was i thinking, to courteously reply by asking if you really wanted me to send you that report. and guess what, you had the cheek to give your signature smirk and tell me in the face that you’ve already graded me for the previous semester. thank you very much, the bottom line is why even demand for my bloody report? just how ignorant and brainless some individuals are.

2. let’s move on to a friendship and self-conscience topic. i’m beginning to despise a person’s behaviour and ethics. if you have what it takes to skip a good old friend’s to head off to a new good friend’s, then you should also have what it takes to bring it out in text. why hide this ugly side from the rest of the world? it’s time to question your self-conscience, before you lose your true side. heed it or leave it, this is earnest advice from one of your good old friends.

3. we’ve never broached this subject before, and i’m referring to you and me. perplexed, confused and in a state of serious dilemma, i’m unable to put these intense feelings into words. but i’ll hereby fortify my stand; even if the frequency of our late night calls seem to be dwindling, it doesn’t mean i don’t wish to hear you through the phone. even if we don’t get to meet up as often as before, it doesn’t mean i don’t see you as frequently in my dreams. even if i’ve never expressed it, it doesn’t mean i don’t wanna shout out loud, to simply say that i’ve been missing you. my point is i don’t love you any less, so don’t doubt my feelings in these days.

moving on, i’ll be on a short getaway to the usuals. it’ll just be a couple of days to let loose, and will ring up my loved ones when i return from Kuala Lumpur. meanwhile, y’all be jovial and take good care.

You Don't Know - 98 Degrees

2007-06-07T22:54:00.000+08:00

you don't know how i feel,
living these days without you
you don't know what it's like,
loving you all this time
i gave you all my love, heart and soul,
risked it all on a chance
now when I need you the most,
you don't know

you've always been and always will be,
the first and last thing on my mind

where are you now, what have you found?

2007-05-23T01:02:00.000+08:00

what a bag of lazy bones! excuse me, i was referring to myself. that’s ‘cause i gave all classes a miss today, entrepreneurship and coaching to be exact. i’m still quite taken aback by my vanished lecture notes; it’s unbearable to not have them for everyday lessons. the above should have already explained for itself.

moving on, i was very much a couch potato for the bulk of today. i’m still running on a vcd marathon actually, with the final episode remaining. i’ll find time, somehow or some way, to finish up. oh yes, i’ve caught the terrible flu bug, hear me sniff. it’s not at all fun to have your nose blocked up throughout the night, no need for more details i guess.

met up with Blessann, Gilbert and Suban in the evening, we were strutting around Bugis Street. and guess what? Miss Blessie was all broke and i’d to prepare packed dinner from home just for the two of us. check out the cliché contents in the tupperware; maggie mee, fried eggs, hotdogs and diet coke. spare me the next time, please. more retail therapy means more stuff filling up the list of wanna-gets, so here i come! after all that window shopping, we headed to Arab Street’s Zam Zam for some chicken and mutton murtabak. i’ll highly recommend the murtabaks there, you’ll have to look no further. the journey home was a quiet, solemn one.

where are you now,
what have you found?

Grace’s nineteenth birthday

2007-05-22T00:08:00.000+08:00

oh my god, it’s been one hell of a week. i’m clueless on where to begin, not to mention the minute events and aftermath. a couple of ridiculous proceedings brought about an array of stirring emotions. and of course, needless to indicate, the following days meant worst for me. i will almost swear i’d been through every emotion that a heart can feel within this past week. fatigue is the outcome for the stress endured, and i’ve been napping like there’s no tomorrow. some people out there will vouch for me on this.

but the only good thing i’ll brag about is the brilliant weekend. you heard me, i described it as brilliant. here comes, it all began on that faithful Friday when a whole bunch of us gathered for Grace’s nineteenth birthday bash. let’s see if i’m able to recall everyone who came; Khorkie, Deepa, Sharmaine, Clara, Heather, Joel, Sharon, Yulian, Charissa, Aili, Chen Hui, Yali, Leanna and myself. yeah, i got them all listed. anyways, we dined at Miss Clarity Café and thereafter, headed for Conrad Hotel where Khorkie booked a room overnight especially for Grace. we dumped our belongings there, mingled around quite a bit and were cracking our heads on where and what to do next. several suggestions went around and it wasn’t long before we found ourselves walking over to DXO. it was ladies’ night, a little commotion at the door but the bouncer still gave in at the end. gin and tonic, sweating out on the dance floor, singing out loud to familiar tunes and all just having the time of our lives. but every now and then, you see a bouncer walk up to me and question my gender. goodness gracious, i’m female, although lady in a not-very-lady-way. rolled my eyes please. the night ended real late, with me dozing off only after 5am. Khorkie drove us home the next morning.

Saturday was a homey day, i’d all the time dedicated to myself. just nap, napping and napped.

Sunday morning, i attended church service and holy communion. nothing perplexing, i was delighted to be at church actually. the rest of the day was spent with Blessann, with retail therapy being the focal pursuit. we were literally visiting every changing room in Orchard Road, trying out an assortment of apparels. fantabulous, i now have a list of things i’d wish to get. Alixues joined us in the evening, we hung around in Far East. more retail therapy and guess what, we bumped into Felicia, Wan Jui, Shirley and Desiree. stood in the middle of Cineleisure and did a little catching up. it felt like the good old times again, great to see them. we’ll go for PL Funfair when the time comes? Blessann and i headed for home not long after. like i said, it was a weekend well spent. thanks for the company, pals.

it’s Monday, and i’m suffering the blues. skipped all lectures today and Hayma’s class was a bore, believe me.

I’ve been sitting here, can’t get you off my mind.

2007-05-12T17:44:00.000+08:00

i’ve been sitting here,
can’t get you off my mind.

the God above is making a fool of me ;
why did He arranged for our paths to meet and permit me to develop heartfelt sentiments for someone whom will never have any reservations for me? i’m not blaming God in any way, it just seems like a love cycle over and over again. every other story sounds the same, how many more times must i be put through such torment?

lately, i find myself staring into blank air, with random concerns replaying in my head. and you never fail to appear in these thoughts, because there isn’t a day i don’t think about you. it’s these days that i desire more time for myself, the need to do self-reflection. yes, i’m an avid negaholic and confessing that i’m also an emo freak isn’t a problem with me. all it takes are little things to make me slip away into such a mental state.

a bouquet of blue roses ;

2007-04-30T22:57:00.000+08:00

yes, y’all tell me about it. i’ve been too caught up with life, the way it seems to be. i can be wasting my days away and not be able to find any time to update this ever-so-still blog of mine. i’m also aware of how every entry’s beginning segment sounds almost alike, but what you see is what you get.

moving on, we’ve been home from Genting Highlands close to a week ago and again, i haven’t enlightened y’all about the happenings of this trip. my utmost gratitude to Meng Siang, Xue Li, Gilbert, Suban, Xiang Ting & Yi Rong for making this 3D/ 2N getaway a memorable and joyous one. the seven of us did heaps of camera whoring, and captured those happy times on pictures and videos. i’ll upload all of such when Yi Rong tosses them over to me.

every moment spent with you,
will be etched deep within the soul of my heart

a bouquet in shades of blue, purple and white ;
you’re the very meaning of forever, special

with nothing more left to elaborate, the above you’ve read is more or less what i’ve been up to during the past 2 weeks of semestral break. heading on to the inner side of things, we’ll not jump into the emotional mood, but let’s just say there are two sides to me, like i’ve always been and always will be. unending dilemma is how i’ll portray it, this occurs when one side of me yearns to know the whole truth but the other wishes and begs to keep current relations as vague as possible. what’s the next best alternative, you question me? i reckon to be an escapist, because sometimes the truth is way too much to handle. or at least, i simply don’t have what it takes.

i’m pleading for just one chance

insignificance belongs to me

2007-04-14T14:40:00.000+08:00

i grasp the point that i haven’t been updating this blog of mine. and yes, there were several things that altered from the previous entry. not that i’m able to recall everything, but at least now i’ve got a different perspective to some issues and new insight to facts i never knew.

undeniable, i’m perpetually filled with mixed feelings. question me today and ask me again tomorrow, you’ll most probably receive answers that are worlds apart. dilemma is the word for this undying sentiment, and it’s the only emotion i seem to bear these days.

just like testing the waters, there is so much i wish i could do. there are times when you appear to be merely inches away and of course, also times when we seem like individuals whom are miles apart. if you’re enjoying the line for now, i’m perfectly fine with it. nevertheless, i’m still in search of that matchless connection with you. whatever it is, we’ll see how everything goes?

at this moment, insignificance belongs to me

Visual DNA

2007-04-07T20:58:00.000+08:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

game over

2007-03-12T23:29:00.000+08:00

my greetings, readers. i'm home once again to text this entry, it'll be rather random, allowing those innermost thoughts to be revealed.

i've never felt this vulnerable in a long time. how did i even get through today, i keep on asking myself. question me and i'll tell you all about the mixed feelings i hold. mentally fatigue, the reality doesn't seem to occur to me. just like before, i find myself lost in a bottomless pit and i've got to face this ordeal alone.

you probably may not be aware of this, but you'd always held a special place in my heart. unknowingly within the past two weeks, this feeling had blossomed into an irreplaceable love. you have a pleasant nature, an adoring personality & a mysterious aura. every detail of you, i was falling in love with. i'd made my moves, there were times you accepted my advances & also, times you chose to belong in the rejection region. no doubt, i was falling too deep, too fast.

the game's over, my heart is burnt and i'm in a state of self-denial. i brought this upon myself, no one else to blame but me. we'll never look at one another the same, i regret. i'll try to hang on to our friendship, but no promises as yet. since i chose to tread this path, i've never given up and never will do. i'll stand up and prove this love's worthwhile. remember this; if you need anything, i'm just a phone call away. these arms are wide open, i'll do anything for you.

every tune i hear is a depressing rendition, every message received causes a tear to fall, every time your name is mentioned, my heart grows colder.

Puzzle Of My Heart - Westlife

2007-03-10T12:40:00.000+08:00

it's the way she fills my senses
it's the perfume that she wears
i feel i'm losing my defences
to the colour of her hair

and every little piece of her is right
just thinking about her
takes me through the night

every time we meet
the picture is complete
every time we touch
the feeling is too much
she's all i ever need
to fall in love again
i knew it from the very start

she's the puzzle of my heart

I’ve never been this close

2007-02-05T22:09:00.000+08:00

i never thought i’d feel this way
especially to one whom i hardly sighted

i stood by this assumption all along ;
that you’ll just be another passer-by
having to make no impact whatsoever
and at the end of my 3-year campus life
we’ll leave not remembering each other

but things turn out as i least expected
and i’m down with wavering doubts

now check this, my way with details ;
it was merely a breath away
that feeling seemingly familiar
your body, scent, voice and touch
i swear i’ve never been this close

listen and hold your horses
it’s not the least scandalous please
i don’t wish for any outcome
i just want things to stay the way they are
and i’m satisfied with the current status
spare me of any emotional strides
thank you very much

I’ve got no fear of losing you,
since I can’t lose what I never had

I don't want to be a negaholic

2007-01-23T00:45:00.000+08:00

i swear i saw it coming
but couldn't do anything
to halt or delay its arrival
things turned out the way i expected
for the worst, that is

i regret unveiling my utmost concerns
'cause they can never be taken back
they'll hold a weight in all our hearts
eventually, affecting & transforming us
to own a bond much different than before

i'm beginning to ridicule myself
i could've suppressed those thoughts within
chose to keep all these a secret
then maybe, circumstances would not change
and i need not face this once more

i don't want to be a negaholic,
but i must say nothing lasts forever

1132日

2006-12-27T03:13:00.000+08:00

不知不觉已经那么久
我待在这没有你的冰河期中
即使回忆不断在重播
已经冻结的爱也不会再暖和

眼中只有你美丽身影
耳朵只搜寻所有关于你的消息
就算我已经往前走
我也徘徊在所有美好往事左右

1132日的分手留下一个好想你的我
一天一年让时间证明
忘记你是我做的假动作
我用了多少寂寞了解你离开的理由
我没有能挽回你的权利
除非你能了解我心有多痛

christmas isn't christmas

2006-12-27T02:04:00.000+08:00

this entry will be rather random,
i just wanna brag about christmas ;

first of all, i've to say that
christmas is not my season
it's just not my time of the year
i've never anticipated its arrival

i dislike the whole idea of
cramming with the crowd at town,
partying or even, making merry

maybe as time passes gradually,
christmas doesn't mean much anymore
my apologies,
i didn't mean to be this extreme

unrealistic thoughts hold my mind
some things are better left unsaid

everytime

2006-12-13T00:22:00.000+08:00

everytime i stroll along the corridors
everytime i turn at a corner
everytime i walk into another canteen
everytime i gaze at crowds of people
i'm aware that a certain part of me
yearns to see you every now and then

i'd bade goodbye to this love long ago
but it seems to be hitting back at me
everything's a dilemma
i'll admit i'm almost vulnerable
especially so, these days
spare me those probing questions
i'm done expressing my inner thoughts
PERIOD.

some things are just not meant to be

BM0083 ICAs cleared

2006-11-24T02:06:00.000+08:00

it's been a rather moderate week
(pardon me for such a queer description)
'cause it's not particularly lifeless
neither is it full of excitement
i know it doesn't really explain it all
but this is as far as it gets

well, at least i've one thing to rejoice
i've cleared all 6 of the BM0083 ICAs
BE Roleplay was just done today
if i'm not wrong, i kinda screwed it
by reading off my script & being nervy
whatever it is, it's over now

moving on,
i headed for the sports hall(gym)
the minute my projects were completed
as usual, to accompany Jtwin & Stella
messed with poker cards throughout
and of course, making a fool of ourselves

Suban came for his personal training
and as promise, showcased the magic trick
Muqsit & Gilbert paid us a surprise visit
thereafter a chill out cum prata session
unknowingly, we conversed quite a bit
they are a funny bunch, i must say

just a random announcement ;
due to some real personal reasons,
i shall not be clubbing tmrw night
(really, what a waste)

不知道在妄想什么
只告诉自己 I believe 一定会有结果
在很久以后留在你身边的是我

blog quitter

2006-11-19T02:31:00.000+08:00

please don't begin by bombarding questions
i'm aware that i haven't been updating y'all

i've to mention in particular that
my home PC was down for the last 2 weeks
and i was dying to share with my readers
the fun stuff that rarely happens

but i guess it's rather late
and i don't have power memory
to even rmbr the actual details
in any case,
i'll let the snapshots do all the talking

you'll have to do a lil' navigation ;
click first on "linkages"
followed by "the camera clicks"
and finally on the 1 album dated 02.11.06

2-3 Nov 2006 Thursday & Friday
Jtwins booked a chalet at Downtown East
cordially invited Sharon & Blessann along
just for a close bonding session
and of course, tequila popping madness
poker cards were the decider
(you know what i mean)
whatever it is,
i enjoyed every minute of it

moving on to something serious,
i've to make a BIG declaration
you can almost quote me ;
"Planning is not an issue,
when it comes to polytechnic students."
you can definitely trust me on this

forward to some semestral stuff ;
i'm currently in the midst of
2 whole bloody ICA weeks
i've been slogging my butts off
and it's now 3 down, 3 more to go

after this week comes to a close
you'll find more of me at
the campus sports hall(SPT Room, that is)
and less of me at the business blocks
i don't know if it's good or bad news
we'll see how everything goes yea?

i wanna quit blogging someday

my monotonous life

2006-11-01T16:08:00.000+08:00

i've returned to blog once again
it's been months since i left my traces
compared to many others out there
i lead a rather monotonous life
to sum it up,
there's nothing to groan or be joyous about

moving on to some updates,

TEP has begun this semester
but it'll be classical for 6 weeks
rather slack & boring i must say
classes seem like weekly workshops
that's why i've ample time to hang around
and of course, how could i forget
i've been popping by campus gym alot lately
just to check out how Jtwin is doing

oh yes, just before it slips outta my mind
i'm obligated to share with y'all
a marvellous snapshot taken during class
that got us laughing our butts off
even Xinyi stayed wide awake for this

omg, what a waste
the snapshot can't be uploaded
i'll go figure out what went wrong
and have it up in no time yea?

on a slightly lighter note,
my dad's back home from hospital today
more or less on the road of recovery
and thank God
i'm relieved from weeks of worry

just before i sign off,
many thanks also to my pals
for your concern, support & friendship
y'all are very much appreciated =DD

i've yet to be mesmerized by you

挑拨 5566

2006-07-29T23:45:00.000+08:00

应该挑拨你和他我想这是最好的时机
只是当你哭着说你还爱他不忍离开他
我竟努力扮演你和他之间的和事佬
应该劝你离开他可是我怎么也做不到
因为当你笑着说我最好了是你知心朋友
我不敢也没有勇气告诉你别把我当朋友

你不了解我和你之间
只是爱上了不爱我却又在乎的人

This is a declaration

2006-07-28T22:51:00.000+08:00

I've got a choice but I'm afraid to make it
I've had a change of heart
I know things now that I didn't know before
I've never been so certain

This is a declaration;
That feeling has faded away and
I can't seem to identify with it anymore
Maybe it's because
I've allowed nature to take its course

The time has come for me
to take a step out of your life

It's a mistake for me to be in this world.

2006-07-27T23:27:00.000+08:00

What the hell was going through my head? I made my mum flare up at me once again. Maybe I'd been trying too hard to let her have a taste of the nasty remarks she passed at me just about a week ago.

Come on, how can a parent bear to say such things about her child? But thanks, Mum. I've seen through you and trust me, there won't be any more second chances from this very moment forth. It's a pity to say, I've lived my life for eighteen years, just to realise now how much my mum dislikes me.

It's a mistake for me to be in this world.

world cup fever

2006-06-23T00:29:00.000+08:00

on a lighter note,
I've caught the world cup fever
Brazil and Argentina, all the way!

my utmost greetings;
Happy Sixteenth Birthday
to my little sister!

a case of escapism

2006-06-23T00:16:00.000+08:00

I've returned to home ground
after 11 days of deliberate getaway;

don't probe me
on the motive of doing so
it's just a case of escapism

But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you

I've completely lost that feeling

2006-06-01T00:44:00.000+08:00

my premonition didn't prove me wrong
things emerged just the way
I contemplated it to be
I knew this day would arrive
but never expected it to be this soon

I should have heeded Jahrell's judgement
to place an end to such raging feelings
before I'd fallen too deep, too hard
but right now,
saying all these already seems pointless

taking a step back,
I disliked the whole denial part

I've completely lost that feeling

不作你的朋友

2006-05-24T00:13:00.000+08:00

慢慢心痛
没有人发现我和从前不同
你的眼中
看得见另一个人给的感动

可不可以不作你的朋友?

The Trouble With Love Is - Kelly Clarkson

2006-05-23T23:50:00.000+08:00

love can be a many splendored thing
can't deny the joy it brings
a dozen roses, diamond rings
dreams for sale and fairytales
it'll make you hear a symphony
and you just want the world to see
but like a drug that makes you blind
it'll fool you everytime

I was once a fool, it's true
I played the game by all the rules
but now my world's a deeper blue
I'm sadder, but I'm wiser too
I swore I'd never love again
I swore my heart would never mend
said love wasn't worth the pain
but then I hear it call my name

everytime I turn around
I think I've got it all figured out
my heart keeps calling
and I keep on falling
over and over again
the sad story always ends the same
me standing in the pouring rain
it seems no matter what I do
it tears my heart in two

the trouble with love is
it can tear you up inside
make your heart believe a lie
it's stronger than your pride
the trouble with love is
it doesn't care how fast you fall
and you can't refuse the call
see, you got no say at all

filled with mixed feelings

2006-05-16T00:02:00.000+08:00

i have several things
circulating in my head
i seem to be gradually allowing
the cares of this world
to wear me down
i'm filled with mixed feelings

despite all of this,
you never fail to place
a smile on my face

trapped in perplexity

2006-05-03T23:37:00.000+08:00

I'm trapped in perplexity
I'm at a loss once again
if only someone out there had
the answers to all my doubts

it doesn't matter to me
how the rest thinks about you

Looking Through Your Eyes - The Corrs

2006-05-02T23:48:00.000+08:00

look at the sky
tell me what do you see
just close your eyes
and describe it to me
the heavens are sparkling
with starlight tonight
that's what I see through your eyes

I see the heavens
each time you smile
I hear your heartbeat
just go on for miles
and suddenly I know
why life is worthwhile
that's what I see through your eyes

love just took me by surprise
because you captivated me

At Your Side - The Corrs

2006-04-30T23:59:00.000+08:00

when the daylight's gone and
you're on your own
and you need a friend just to be around
I will comfort you
I will take your hand
I'll pull you through
I will understand

if life's standing still and
your soul's confused
and you cannot find what road to choose
if you make mistakes
you can't let me down
I will still believe
I will turn around

you know that I'll be at your side
there's no need to worry
together we'll survive
through the haste and hurry
if you feel like you're alone
and you've nowhere to turn
I'll be at your side

a simple recognition;
I believe in you

hear me out;

2006-04-29T21:49:00.000+08:00

hear me out;

you think that you're okay
but I don't believe in what you say

let yourself go
don't you worry about a thing
breaking the chains
I know its hard to begin
just follow your heart
don't be afraid

don't hideaway
because I know that
you've got what it takes
I believe you can be what you wanna be

even if everyone else disregards you
do always remember there's still me

you are my sunshine

2006-04-29T14:14:00.000+08:00

you are my sunshine
my only sunshine
you make me happy
when skies are grey
you'll never know, girl
how much I LOVE YOU
please don't take my sunshine away

search me;
you'll find yourself in my heart

my first day as a year 2

2006-04-17T23:55:00.000+08:00

today marks my first day as a year 2
i'm beginning to feel old actually
like the expired young ones in school
i kinda miss those freshmen days

its superb to be back at campus
you get to bump into familiar faces
and greet them like before
do some catching up
or perhaps, just crack a lame joke?

of course, how could i forget
with a new batch of year 1s
joining the sbm family at campus
it'll give some individuals a reason
to be hanging about more often
and do with some "bay-watching"?
pardon me, but it happens

whatever it is
i'm just contented to be at school

The More I See You

2006-04-10T01:00:00.000+08:00

the more i see you,
the more i want you
somehow this feeling,
just grows and grows
with every sigh
i become more mad about you,
more lost without you,
and so it goes
can you imagine
how much i'll love you,
the more i see you
as days go by
i know the only one for me can only be you
my arms won't free you;
my heart won't try

If Tomorrow Never Comes

2006-04-09T00:43:00.000+08:00

if tomorrow never comes
will she know how much I loved her
did I try in every way
to show her every day
that she's my only one

Cinderena

2006-04-08T02:21:00.000+08:00

somebody
loves
you
like
never
before

大城小爱

2006-03-28T14:25:00.000+08:00

脑袋都是你
心里都是你
念的都是你
全部都是你

`you are the key to my heart

vic invades. (:

2006-03-01T01:49:00.000+08:00

finally, i got t meet up with my dearest sista. ((:
went t get my stuff done up nd off we start`d our outing.
head`d over t cine, supposedly t catch a movie.
but apparently there weren`t shows that we want`d t watch.
so over t burger king for her burger. WOOST.
i enjoy seeing people get fat hah.
walk`d ard cine, follow`d by heeren nd over t far east.
oh, i was in a super good mood nd so i decided t be extremely nice.
i help this guy do his survey. awww. so nice. HAAA.
sista was totally being irritating; kept tempting me t eat ice cream.
uh uh; i didn`t fall into her trap. (:
anw, this super nice jacket caught my eye.
( oh boy, it was love at first sight ). ((:
OH YES; we went over t DFS galleria.
snipsnap shots ard d place.
it`s a mixture of indian,chinese nd malay stuffs. HA.
procceed t pacific; but oh oh, i`m sorry t say this.
but my battery was running low, nd i was super duper tired.
so yes, being a nice sista, she agreed t head back home.
got suishi nd she walk`d me t d station.

SISTA; thanks for accompanying over today. (: nd it was really great catching up with you. i can`t wait for more outings nd everything. =DD lovelove.

my material fulfilment

2006-02-25T23:58:00.000+08:00

my material fulfilment;

=> ivory N70 phone
=> silver iPod mini(FOC)

complete yayness

`my heart has something for you

SBM Clubbers Outing '06

2006-02-25T23:36:00.000+08:00

SBM Clubbers Outing '06;

met Jahrell, 10am at TPY
with a plastic bag of
bottled syrup & water

evidently, Jtwins were
the drinks in-charge

anyway, we made our way
to West Coast Park
and gathered with the rest

i'd a zealous time
mingling with the clubbers

the expiration of my semestrals

2006-02-23T11:54:00.000+08:00

the expiration of my semestrals;

approximately 7 vacation weeks to
be totally frolic & berserk,
catch up with my pals
or search for a part-time job

meanwhile, i just yearn to become
a full-time couch potato

i've lived for 18 years

2006-02-21T23:31:00.000+08:00

i've lived for 18 years;

finally gotten the access permit to
purchase liquor & tobacco legally,
hit the clubs outrightly,
acquire a driving license
and enjoy M-18 shows

my gratitude to family & pals;

in spite the arduous week,
y'all made my day!

macroecons paper

2006-02-20T19:52:00.000+08:00

i screwed up the macroecons paper
just as i'd pre-empted

i've got to buck up for tmrw's paper
accounting for assets

grandma's wake

2006-02-20T12:36:00.000+08:00

my family and i arrived from kuala lumpur
only in the wee hours this morning

we'd been away during the weekends
to attend my grandma's wake
it's been a grievous & tear-jerking ride
especially so for my dad

i'm emotionally drained
and in the midst of semestrals
three more papers to go
i'm gonna need all your prayers

salvage our friendship

2006-02-12T22:54:00.000+08:00

just when i deemed
the hostility among us had ceased
circumstances triggered off for the worst
without any evident indications

i'm only attempting
to salvage our friendship

the game of religion

2006-02-05T17:16:00.000+08:00

i'm sick of playing
the game of religion

i'm tired of losing
the reason for living

the spice of my life

2006-01-31T14:04:00.000+08:00

i reckon
i've found the spice of my life

`a nostalgia for YOU

~WHEE

2006-01-18T12:37:00.000+08:00

~WHEE

acknowledge my apologies;
i'd been plain slothful

nevertheless
my current life hasn't made
any significant deviations

i vouch i'll find time
to update y'all on my life

night out with Jia En

2005-11-10T23:18:00.000+08:00

tutorials ended by 5pm thereabouts
hurried over to meet Jia En at town
in order to pass her
her delayed birthday gift;
a box of scrumptious brownies
i knew she'd adore them

headed over to Raffles City
met up with Jia En's playmates
and set off to TPY Central
they were hitting the banks

i bumped into my sports idol
make a guess who she is?
it should be rather simple
she is LI JIAWEI!

we'd exchanged grins
i was on cloud nine
she certainly made my day
`YAYY

joined Jia En's playmates
to dinner at Mcdonalds
they were fagging the whole time
till my garments reeked of smoke
nevertheless
i made new mates

meet up soon again?
i'll be waiting

It's KBOX Time!

2005-11-09T11:25:00.000+08:00

i'm astonished
upon viewing my tagboard
just a while ago

it seems someone else
is more thrilled than me
about heading to KBOX later
to sing our lungs out
that person is none other than VIVIAN

yup, i'm definitely ready
to sing duets or whatsoever
the tunes are in my veins
can you beat that, Vivian?

i'm off to my last class
and IT'S KBOX TIME!
`YAYY

a boil on my nose

2005-11-07T11:35:00.000+08:00

christmas seems early this year
especially for me

the reason being;
i've got a boil on my nose

i bear a resemblance to
wanna make a guess?
yup, you've got it
Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer

maybe Santa might knock on my door
he'll need help to give out presents

life's rather boring
i just wanna entertain y'all
`LOL

i'm down with food poisoning

2005-11-06T17:47:00.000+08:00

currently down with food poisoning
i'm having the runs too

not a usual sunday;
no church service
no Singers' practice
and plenty of rest

i faced four walls the entire day
how boring can it get

day out with Heather

2005-11-04T23:08:00.000+08:00

Grace is down with dengue
admitted into CDC
paid My Happening a visit
along with my pals;
Sharon & Jahrell
Heather & Xiao Sheng

Grace's condition isn't well
hope she pulls through it
i'll keep her in my prayers

a day out with Heather;

headed down to town
filled our tummies at Sakae
i've improved my record to 16 plates
we, the Budds had Bud's ice-cream

FINALLY
we'd brand new prints again!
but we ran out of poses in the machine
resorted to posing with our Nintendos

walked around
bought our dose of alcohol pops
headed back to Heather's carpark
we'd a great time catching up

journeyed over to Auntie's

Stolen

2005-10-25T15:47:00.000+08:00

you were my eyes when I couldn't see
you were my air when I couldn't breathe
but you always knew what you meant to me

you were my strength when I was down
you made me humble when I wouldn't bow
I held on to your promise that
you'd be around

`you've stolen my heart

Transporter 2

2005-10-23T21:35:00.000+08:00

just another usual Sunday;
church service & Singers' practice

hit the theaters
caught 'Transporter 2'
along with Kris & Henry
dinner at Taco Bell

my return.

2005-10-20T14:10:00.000+08:00

acknowledge my apology;

my PC is conked out
all thanks to my lil Bro
that explains why i've been away

the new semester has begun
along with 6 suicide modules
oh well

nevertheless

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TO JAHRELL!

night out with Grace.

2005-08-31T23:17:00.000+08:00

i'd intended to be at my alma mater
paying my teachers a visit
but i was unwell
and gave it a miss

rested at home the entire day

headed down to Marina Square
a night out with Grace
accompanied my Happening
to a haircut at Chapter 2
we'd dinner thereafter
Kelvin drived us home

i reckon to starve myself
in order to shed some weight

i've to be strong-willed!

solitude.

2005-08-30T21:02:00.000+08:00

i blew my top
in any case, i ought to
you've no clue whatsoever
the predicament within me

i reckon
solitude is my companion

the semestrals are done.

2005-08-25T21:03:00.000+08:00

the semestrals are cleared

i've regain my freedom
the vacation begins!
~YAYY

in the midst of semestrals.

2005-08-24T19:40:00.000+08:00

three modules down
one more to go

under immense pressure
intensive revision
bottles of chicken essence
i'm strained

Matthew's 11th Birthday.

2005-08-21T23:17:00.000+08:00

i've been home 6 consecutive days
perturbed and shagged
the examinations begin tomorrow
i'm gone
please bless me

nonetheless

Happy 11th Birthday to my Lil Bro!

dreaded.

2005-08-20T20:18:00.000+08:00

in my opinion;
this week is my utmost dread

envisage this;
you seem to be enduring insomnia
but unable to figure out why
you wanna get down to crucial mugging
but your psyche seems far off
and when semestrals are next week
you're somewhat counted dead

acknowledge this;
i'm all of the above

in other words;
i'm a failure
in all aspects
i ought to faint away

mugged.

2005-08-17T20:39:00.000+08:00

i've been home two entire days
accompanied my cousins from US
they're an extremely active bunch
all of a sudden i was kiddy again
we'd great enjoyment though

i've began minimal mugging
when examinations are next week
the 4 killing modules
i'll have heaps to mug on
please wish me luck
i'll need plenty of it

`YOU're my significant concern

`Purest of Pain.

2005-08-14T10:33:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry I didn't mean to call
But I couldn't fight it
I guess I was weak
And couldn't even hide it
So I surrender just to hear your voice
I know how many times I said
I'm gonna live without you
Maybe someone else is
Standing there beside you
But there's something
That you need to know
That deep inside me I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking

I wish I could tell you
I'm feeling better every day
That it didn't hurt me when you walked away
But to tell you the truth I can't find my way
And deep inside me I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking

Vida, give me back my fantasies
The courage that I need to live
The air that I breathe
Carino mio, my world becomes so empty
My day's are so cold and lonely
And each night I taste the purest of pain

`YOU're my purest of pain

Joyce's 17th Birthday.

2005-08-13T14:19:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY TO JOYCE!

munch up all my brownies
and put on some weight will you?

finally from me;
rmb to always be cheery
~hugs

Jtwin tees.

2005-08-12T23:42:00.000+08:00

the final day of this semester;
too fatigued to get out of bed
skipped econs tutorial

next week will be revision break
i've got to pull up my socks
and begin intensive mugging
or else i'll be gone

headed down to Suntec City
along with Jahrell
walked around quite a bit
bought our Jtwin tees
from Maui & Sons

bumped into Amelia & Sin Ee
Jahrell joined them thereafter

i'd to attend church's thanksgiving dinner
held at Raffles City Convention Centre
we'd loads of fun
especially with my Singers'

Jahrell's script

2005-08-11T11:17:00.000+08:00

Jahrell's script;
missed Stats Tutorial
but was on time for Marketing Tutorial

headed down to Suntec City
together with Sharon, Joyce and Jahrell
accompanied Jahrell to Nokia Care
the other two left for Millennia Walk
went over to find them

cabbed Joyce home
sent Sharon thereafter
had a casual talk with Jahrell

the lastest phrase that
everyone's been saying to me
Joyce said it for 5 times

there's a room in my heart for you

EWS ICA3 Project.

2005-08-10T21:43:00.000+08:00

the final accounts tutorial;
Wendy Wong was inflicted with temper
at least i was among the casualties
oh well

EWS project was due by 1pm
my team mates handed me their sections
while i compiled the report
we made it in time

finally, projects are done
exams are next to come
when will i buck up?
`shakes head

National Day.

2005-08-09T23:51:00.000+08:00

it's National Day
hence a day off from school
i'd been looking forward to rest
or simply sticking with the tv

headed out after lunch
journeyed over to Heather's carpark
Charissa was in distress
we'd a chat regarding her concerns
i attempted to ease the tensions
i hope i'd been of help though

CENSOR gathered at Grace's
Sharon couldn't make it
we'd bbq for dinner
chilled and caught up a little

hurried through my EWS project
assisted by Grace, Charissa & Yulian
i completed my section
i was relieved

`I missed YOU this every instant

i'd been a couch potato.

2005-08-07T22:59:00.000+08:00

in simple words;
it was a usual sunday
with service and singers' practice
headed home immediately

i'd been a couch potato again
maybe i must succumb to this soon
or else it will grasp over me

~maybe i should release You soon
in this way, i'd be jovial again

Flesh Imp Cap.

2005-08-06T23:37:00.000+08:00

my entire world came crashing over me
broke down to ease the burden upon me

i headed out into the streets
and figured out i was stagnant
as the truths daunt on me
that everyone else is simply caught up

thanks Grace for being there
and lent me your listening ear
i needed it
~hugs

effective writing presentation.

2005-08-05T21:55:00.000+08:00

ineffective writing presentation;
ZhiCong joined us at the last minute
but my team mates handled it well
at least i'm satisfied myself

headed home thereafter
i'd become an instant couch potato
napped in the afternoon
chilled around
and nearly died of boredom
oh well

`I need a love to last forever

marketing presentation.

2005-08-04T23:23:00.000+08:00

my mktg presentation turned out great
all credit to my fellow team mates
my group was the first to present
we were dressed smart in black & white
`WHOAA

went home to wash up
headed over to Xinyi's
we'd INeffective Writing project to rush
the presentation is tmr
dumped our geography notes into the report
snacked a little while cracking our heads
finally the ppt slides were done too
GREAT, we finished it ourselves
the boys are free-riders
oh well

`the colour YOU've left in my life is black